Hello loves!!! I’ve missed you all, and thanks to all those who read The Art of Rough Sex and gave me such good feedback. I appreciate all of my readers! These past few weeks have been all over the place for me: Hurricane Sandy, losing power in my house for almost 2 weeks straight, laptop possibly destroyed, and so much more. I can honestly say that one person kept me sane through all of that and I love him for that. But enough about my personal life, lets get to the topic for The Real Deal today! I will be looking into 8 Male Pleasure spots that you may or may not know about. I will be talking to the guys today but ladies you should still pay attention though!
I know you don’t want to know where other guys want to be touched, but the thing is, do you even know where you want to be touched? Most guys have only two places they usually think about being touched: their penises and their balls.
I mean, come on. Women are always complaining that guys head straight to their vaginas and breasts the second the clothes come off, and they want something more. Are you sure that you don’t? Of course you do, and so here I am to help you figure out where you want your girl to touch you before she heads to the parts that’ll result in an eruption.
So, without further ado, here are 8 Male Pleasure Spots, in no particular order:
If you don’t know it yet, women love being touched, kissed and licked in this area, so chances are you’ll enjoy it just as much as they do. The next time your woman is on top in the bedroom and comes close to your face, elongate your neck and let her do her thing.
2- Hair & head
No, I’m not suggesting that she lick your hair, but having a woman run her hands through your hair or squeeze her fingertips all along your scalp will help you relax and prepare for whatever else she wants to do to you.
Given that they’re clean, having a woman lick and nibble on your earlobes, or even doing something as simple as telling you some nasty things she wants to do to you, can have a lasting effect on your erection.
On to other areas that women would love to explore…
Located between your scrotum and your anus, this area can provide plenty of fantastic sensations for you. The next time she’s greeting your penis with her mouth and hands, encourage her to apply some pressure with her fingers and/or her tongue. You’ll be surprised at how much you’ll like it.
Now, this is not for every guy. Some guys love to have their nipples manipulated; others can’t stand it. The only way to find out is by letting a woman try it. Let her lick and perhaps suck them. Who knows, if she enjoys doing it to you that much, this might be your “in” to getting her to try it on another woman next.
If a woman has ever sucked your fingers, you know that it almost feels like she’s sucking your penis. The next time you’re engaging in foreplay, stick your middle finger in her mouth and let her suck on it, and see what comes up.
Some guys get freaked out about their backsides, but if you just open your mind, you’ll discover that that’s where your G-spot is. Whether you let her lick the rim of your anus or place a finger inside and make a “come hither” motion, you’ll discover that letting a woman have her way in that area will make your sexual experiences that much better.
8- Back & coccyx
Sometimes lying on your stomach and letting your girl run her hands and tongue up and down your back is the best feeling in the world. From massaging you, to giving you the chills by lightly running her tongue down the baby hairs on your back, submit to your girl and let her enjoy rubbing your back and your tailbone.
get to know yourself
The only way to figure out what you like is by experimenting. So the next time you crawl into bed with a woman, let her have her way for a little while, before you have your way with her.
I’m sure my male readers will have something to say about this topic. Some will agree and others will disagree with at least one or two of these spots. Mention me on twitter (@ladylove_TFP) with your comments about today’s post or any other post of mine. Until next time, try new things with your girl!!! Lady Love out <3
Hello loves!!! I’ve missed you as much as you miss me. I promise I will be blogging weekly again, unless I really can’t get to a computer one day. I’ve had things going on in just about every aspect of my life, but things are starting to turn around. So anyways, today on The Real Deal my topic is The Art of Rough Sex. I will be speaking as if to straight men, but this goes for anyone who wants to engage in this kind of sexual encounter. Some people shy away from it because of what they think it entails. However, rough sex need not involve violence (unless you both are into that sort of thing), it can be, however, whatever you want it to be and you can take it as far as you and your partner are willing to go.
Making love is an integral part of most couple’s lives and while some couples stick to the basic peaches and cream variety of sex, others opt to venture into more dangerous territory, hence rough sex. Mildly sadistic behavior has become a widespread phenomenon in the bedroom and today’s sex tip is all about showing your woman who the boss of the bedroom is. Uh, that would be you, buddy.
She Moaned Yes!
Now before you delve into all the sexual and potentially torturous fun that you’re all giddy about, keep in mind that this kind of sex must be consented to beforehand. Whether it’s your long-time girlfriend, wife or a one-night stand, you have to ensure that she’s into the mildly painful event that may come up in the immediate future. And if it’s a first for both of you, establish a safeword that either of you can use if you feel that things are going too far. Believe it or not, there may be things that you’re uncomfortable doing to her. The safeword must be a word that you would never use during lovemaking, something like “pineapples” or “truck driver”.
You can either approach the topic during talkative and mild foreplay or you can talk about it when there’s no sexual escapade occurring. When you’re kissing her, you can start out by holding her hair tightly by the back roots and ask if she enjoys the feeling of it whilst kissing her mouth. If she moans, then you can talk a little more about the adventurous things you’d like to do with her. The point is to make sure that she’s up for it, otherwise, you might just end up on the receiving end of a bad reaction.
Roughin’ It Up
Pain and pleasure are not that different in that they both release endorphins (neurotransmitters — the body’s natural painkillers). Experiencing sexual pleasure releases endorphins and so does a spanking. Endorphins are likely released amid experiencing pain in order to soothe the mind. But then again, the pain I’m referring to doesn’t have to be intense. It all depends on what the two of you are up for.
For the tame
Light spanking: If she hasn’t yet experienced the ultimate sensation of spanking, approach the act in a gentle manner. Start out by petting and rubbing her butt in a playful manner and lightly slap her butt, immediately returning to petting it. Gradually slap her butt more often and with more intensity. Keep the constant blows to her buttocks at a rhythmic pace — this will have a potentially transcendental effect.
Biting: If done right, biting can provide for some incredibly erotic pleasure. Slowly kiss and eventually start nibbling on different parts of the body including (but not limited to) her neck, shoulders, hips, outer thighs, and buttocks. Depending on her reaction, begin biting with more intensity, but don’t break the skin — that’s not your intention.
Hair pulling: At times, my girlfriend purposely puts her hair in a ponytail or pigtails during foreplay so that I could pull on it while I’m making love to her in the doggy position. Then again, there are those times when she leaves it down and I place my hands at the back of her head, pull her head back by the roots of her hair so that she’s forced to lean back while she’s on top and I get to penetrate her to the fullest extent. Try it.
Hold her down by wrists: There are times when she wants to move her hands all over your body, but don’t let her. Pin her arms down by the wrists and don’t allow her to move them at all. The best place to do this is up against a wall. The next time she enters your lair, hold her wrists above her head with one arm and use the other to place your fingers inside of her while you kiss her intensely.
For the wild
Handcuffs: It’s one thing to pin her hands down, it’s a whole other ballgame when you handcuff her to an inanimate object like the bedpost. What’s even better than handcuffs is cloth ties. Tie down her arms and legs and have your way with her. You can spank, tease, or even torture her by massaging her entire body with a vibrator. Point is that she’s completely submissive to your whim.
Whipping: Obedience at its finest calls for a little bit of discipline. Instead of simply putting her over your knee and spanking her, why not show her that she’s been misbehaving by giving her a little whipping? If you do it just right, she’ll be throbbing and begging you to take her.
Choking: Because choking reduces the flow of oxygen to the brain, and results in somewhat of a hallucinogenic state, it has developed into a fetish for many people. Although it could be dangerous, if you simply hold her neck rather than actually choke her, it could provide that sensation of submission and control. Please be very careful and proceed with caution when it comes to asphyxiation.
Hard to get: This is most women’s number one fantasy. She acts like she doesn’t want to make love and you force yourself on her. Again, I have to emphasize that this is acting and she has already consented to this act beforehand. She tries her damnedest to push you off of her and keep you from penetrating her and you try your hardest to get inside. After removing her clothes (some women enjoy dressing up in tattered clothing so that their men can rip it off) and finally getting inside while she’s whispering and moaning “no,” make your way to her ear and whisper, “yes…”
Of course, there are more ways to get rough with your significant other, but these suggestions will definitely open up a venue to a host of other ways to enjoy a little rough sexual behavior.
Well that’s it for today. I hope that you view rough sex a little different after reading my blog today. Personally, I enjoy rough sex every now and then! Maybe a little more than that…lol. Until next time, rough it up a little bit. Lady Love out! <3
Hello loves!!! Sorry that I’m a day late, this week has been kinda up and down, then side to side for me lol. To anyone reading this, if you don’t already do so, please tune in to my radio show The Love Hour at wrnu.info Tuesdays from 6-8pm! Without further ado, welcome to The Real Deal with yours truly, Lady Love. Today my topic is about how to keep a relationship afloat and on course. Many people think that finding someone compatible to get into a relationship with is the hard part of falling in love, but what they don’t realize is that it takes a different sort of effort to stay in love. There are plenty of barriers that make it challenging to maintain a healthy and happy relationship; stress, communication problems, and jealousy are only just a few. Here are four ways to get ahead of the barriers before they make your relationship drift too far to bring it back.
1. Plan quality time
The thought of having to plan to share quality time together might not seem much fun, but when life gets busy (which it always has a tendency of doing) your relationship shouldn’t have to run the risk of decline simply because you took the power of a date day/night for granted. When you slot in activities after a day’s work or look ahead to enjoyable weekend pursuits, the two of you get to share looking forward into the future, together. There’s a chemistry that develops, an excitement for what’s to come, because you never quite know what great things can happen when you make a point of creating such valuable opportunities.
Planning quality time sets your relationship up for success. Making fun plans was exactly what the two of you did before you got committed in the first place; do you really think your relationship can withstand an absence of such continued attention? Yes, there are important things to be done… but if you don’t reaffirm the bond you’ve created with each other, no chore or errand will be worth the risk of separation. Here are some easy ways to get started:
* get outdoors
* try a sport or hobby that’s new to both of you
* do a couples-oriented activity
* cook together
* go out with another couple (make sure they’re fun!)
* plan a trip
2. Learn to communicate difficult feelings
A chapter from the book, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus,” is about learning to communicate difficult feelings, and how it is one of the cornerstones of keeping a relationship from drifting away. But all too often, it is a skill that falls sadly to the wayside. Why is it so hard for couples to express emotion without it being at their partner’s expense? “When we are upset, disappointed, frustrated, or angry, it is difficult to communicate lovingly”, says author John Gray, PhD. “When negative emotions come up, we tend momentarily to lose our appreciation, and respect. At such times, even with the best intentions, talking turns into fighting.”
Since you’ve got an entire lifetime to practice healthy emotional expression - not to mention unlearn unsuccessful communication strategies that you’ve picked up along the way - there’s no better time to start than now. A great area to start with is being selective about when you ‘discuss’ provoking topics. When voices rise and conversations turn ugly, politely request an time-out by saying something like, “I’m having a hard time being rational and I don’t want to offend you because I’m upset. I’d like to cool off before we continue our discussion.”
3. Avoid using sex as a weapon
All too often, a bickering couples sex life has to get dragged through the mud when they fight. An innocent victim of power struggles, jealous fits, or whatever other relationship issue that truly deserves the blame, sex becomes the weapon that couples use to get back at each other over hurt feelings and resentment. Granted, when you’re ticked off at your boyfriend or girlfriend, the last thing you probably want to do is give them the satisfaction of sexual pleasure, but the fact is there’s no sense in creating permanent barriers in the bedroom over petty problems in your day to day life.
The truth of the matter is that sex shouldn’t ever be treated like a chore, or as a duty, but when you don’t learn to communicate difficult feelings (see #1) effectively, grudges fester and important conversations get left unsaid, and your sexual connection slowly gets chipped away at because you’re withdrawn or upset. When problems arise, talk it out, negotiate a solution, and then go make up. How? You guessed it - work out the last bit of tension after your fight is over in a more mutually beneficial sort of way aka make up sex!
4. Don’t avoid problems because you’re scared of being single
People stay in bad relationships longer than they should because the fear of the pain of dating seems scarier than the pain of a bad relationship. People prefer to cling to the familiar, even when it’s painful, rather than attempt to stretch themselves with the hope of expanding their happiness.
Sometimes the fear of the unknown prevents people from exploring issues that could threaten the relationship that they’re in. Although it’s scary to consider having to start over with someone new, the common denominator in all your relationships is you, and an unwillingness to face problems head-on is a pattern that can make any couple drift apart.
So go ahead and take a good look on yourself, your partner, and your relationship. If you see something you don’t like, consider yourself fortunate for uncovering it so early. When there are issues that need to be addressed with your partner, do so in a positive and constructive manner; if they’re willing to face reality with the same dedication you are, you’ll have little trouble finding strategies to deal with them.
No relationship is immune to problems arising out of stress, communication breakdowns, or personality conflicts. What sets a happy couple apart from one that is drifting apart is knowing how to identify issues and cope with obstacles as a team. Hope you enjoyed today’s edition of The Real Deal. Until next week, stay afloat!!! Lady Love out <3
They say it because it’s what you are. It angers me when I see people that I share a similar skin tone with out in public acting a damn fool. One, because this society is to ignorant to realize that Black is not race or a culture but a color, also a term no different than African American or Negro, used to classify the race of the displaced Africans who lineage has led to our birth in the United States. It does not mean that anyone of brown or darker skin who is not white. There are classifications and distinctions for them. Two, at the end of the day, since we are all classified as black in this ignorant society, we are judged by the individual, not by the majority. I support this statement by saying, do you think Barack Obama has changed the perception of Black Americans when we can go on any corner, block or avenue in an urban community and find a baker’s dozen of ignorant gang members who stand as the symbol of organized chaos. Yes, I’m upset this morning.
To be honest with you my anger comes from a simple incidence at McDonald’s this morning. Hispanic American is trying to take an order. Black American gives the order as he’s talking to Pookie and Ray Ray on the block. When the order is captured incorrectly, he yells out to the before mentioned Hispanic American, “yerp!” to get his attention. The Hispanic American does not respond, as I’m pretty sure when he took his ESL classes “yerp” was not a word that he learned and was trained to recognize. When the Hispanic American notices that the ignorant call for attention is directed at him, he responds. The Black American ask that his order be corrected. The Hispanic American relates the changes to the order to his co-workers in Spanish. You know what the Black American had the nerve to say?
“These muhfuckers should learn to say the language right, my nigga. I’m saying, you working in these here states. Speak our shit abundantly.”
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! Besides the obvious ignorance with the Ebonics and misuse of words, I hate when Black Americans use this statement. Should I remind them that we don’t generally speak correct FUCKING English ourselves. Also, I thought nigga was a term of endearment. YET, every time I hear it….ie music, explanations, movies….it’s being used an acceptable substitute to the word nigger that NO ONE SHOULD BE SAYING!! I don’t understand why so many people have accepted these negative forms of communication and expression as the Black American “culture.” Why don’t they see that they are just as much the problem and even further away from the solution.
Voting for Obama on November 6 does not make you a proud American or a good Black person. Being educated and being able to communicate and enriching the society with knowledge they did not have and are currently not receiving because most of you Black Americans are not receiving or distributing the knowledge you have. Sorry, you probably didn’t get that. let me rephrase. You niggers don’t know shit and continue to show that by representing your disillusioned “culture” in your clothes, attitude and language…..my nigga.
Perfectly nourished nails its natural essence fueling the blame. Aim directed at your heart but your mind runs this game of right and wrong. All along the way you deal with vindictive actions being boomeranged in your direction. No protection can protect this force field, especially if you are always the product it feigns for.
You ever sit back and marinate on the thought of it is me not everyone else? Besides pointing fingers at the chaos that comes in your peaceful world. People react based off your reactions, so if everyone around you rather hound you with bad intentions… Something says you better look inside instead of pointing that perfectly nourished nail their way.
You cannot find the answers because you have yet to ask yourself the right questions! People everywhere are not evil and out for your demise, please believe I have encountered many positive vibes on continuous ongoing basis.
So face it… Something is not sitting right at home, you can only be the judge of your reasoning. Reason with third eye views to gain a different perspective. Outline your future and goals be your own detective.
Perfectly nourished nail…
Watch how you point that finger.
Brooke Jean - @Brooke_Jean on twitter
Good evening beautiful people! Kiannah here and I know I’ve been m.i.a for a few weeks, but I was in serious need of a hiatus just to get my son together for school and now that he’s all settled in and adjusting well, I can focus on one of my favorite things writing in THE FINE PRINT/TRES BEAUTEOUS! I decide that I want to change things up a bit in Tres Beauteous same subject backgrounds, but on a schedule for each Tuesday like they say change is good (who is the “THEY” btw I’ve always wanted to know…LOL).
So here is the schedule:
1st Tuesday- Health Product Review
2nd Tuesday- Beauty Product Review
3rd Tuesday- Interview Day
4th Tuesday- “You inspire Me”
*Oh if their is a month where we have a 5th Tuesday then im doing a freestyle kinda post…
Does that sound good? I hope so, Im really excited to see what I come up with each week…by the way the new schedule will start next Tuesday so stay tuned and until next week my darlings…Be fabulous, be classy, but most importantly stay true to you. Peace.
Hello loves!!! I have been away for too long, but it was a well needed break. I know a bunch of my regular readers missed me because they messaged me and texted me every Thursday asking me why I didn’t post anything. Well the wait is over! Today on The Real Deal I will be focusing on things that people do that ruins their 20’s. It’s an age where most people start to become mature and move from adolescence into adult-hood. For some its easy, for others its a day to day struggle. I was inspired by a tweet by my friend Edeline (@idontknow_ede on twitter) so shout out to her! So this article online at the Thought Catalog caught my attention because I wanted to know if I did any of the things on this list. Try and guess how many apply to me! lol
15 Ways 20-Somethings Ruin Their Twentys
1. Letting themselves get out of shape. If you’ve ever watched The Biggest Loser and questioned the contestants desire, based on their struggles — you’ve never been out of shape. You’ll find that the rumors are true, and your metabolism moves slower than a snail at the DMV as you get older. If you continue washing down brownies with Mountain Dew and discounting the value of working out, you will pay. I assure you that once you’ve officially gotten out of shape, it’s so much harder to get fit. The mere sight of a treadmill will make you want to run anywhere but on it.
2. Spending substantial amounts of money on farfetched concepts. Buying several lottery tickets, playing the slot machines and joining pyramid schemes are all poor decisions, with slim chances of making profit. (Heads Up: 99% of well-dressed individuals who approach you with a business proposal/job opportunity just want you to help them build an unprofitable pyramid.)
3. Staying involved in destructive relationships. In middle school and high school, everyone dated everyone — but your 20s should see stricter standards and principles enforced. There’s no sense in being with someone whom you can’t picture yourself happily with in the foreseeable future. Don’t get me wrong, fixing damaged relationships is great; but trying to glue back a thousand broken pieces while getting cut in the process is unhealthy.
4. Cohabitating with a lover whom you’re not married to. Often couples convince themselves that moving in together is a splendid idea, when that’s not always the case. Sure, some live happily together, but it’s not for everyone. Be certain that you’re not rushing into things. It’s not as simple as sharing a shower, owning his and hers robes, and having sex frequently. Many characteristics are revealed, and obnoxious habits are exposed. Living with a significant other too early can be detrimental to the entire relationship.
5. Accepting and embracing drama. When you graduate high school, the cattiness and immaturity proceed to follow some. We have to refuse to be a part of any high school level shenanigans. Hearsay, gossip, he-said-she-said — all those bastards got a diploma and followed some miserable souls well into their 20s. It’s a matter of rejecting the slightest hint of drama, and wisely refusing to speak, act, or feel anything based off of it.
6. Settling for a subpar job that makes you miserable. Hard work and dedication, no matter who the employer, are admirable traits. If you find yourself performing unhappily at a place, be certain that you’re just doing so as a means to get by until you can pursue your personal goals. Every opportunity to take a shot at your dream career should be greeted passionately by you. Too often people forget that the 20s are an ideal decade for trial and error. Test things out, then fail or succeed.
7. Putting excessive amounts of value in attention received on social networks. Gauging your popularity and significance by the amount of likes your Facebook statuses got. Feeling physically unappealing because your Instagram photo — which you spent an absurd amount of time selecting an effect for — didn’t get a satisfying amount of compliments and responses.
8. Being a pushover. Little things like accepting the wrong drink at Starbucks, or pretending not to notice someone cutting you in line aren’t crucial. The issue is the snowball effect that follows. People see that you’ll give an inch, so they’ll greedily take a mile. In today’s world, it’s hard to be nice without somebody trying to take advantage of your kindness. Establish firm limitations that people know better than to cross. It might take temporary sternness, but in the long run it’ll pay off.
9. Taking pride in being widely considered a b-tch or a d-ck. Why being loathed (for good reason) has become a fad is beyond me, but it’s definitely a thing. It’s fantastic to be who you are, but to consciously treat people sh-tty and then brag about having “haters” is just dumb. Nobody is invincible — so continuously pouring gasoline, lighting matches and burning bridges will come back to haunt anyone eventually.
10. Being self-destructive. Continuing personally damaging conduct, with no intentions of stopping can have a lasting effect on your 20s. Getting arrested, pissing off friends, being irresponsible with finances — these are just a few of the seemingly infinite ways to ruin one’s self.
11. Passing on spontaneous adventures and the opportunity to experience new things. If friends are taking an impromptu trip to a nearby city, pack a small bag and roll with. These little things are what make the decade. Beyond the inside jokes and perspective on classic stories that you’ll miss out on, you’ll lack good times. If serious responsibility isn’t withholding your presence, then nothing else should be. Attend gatherings, give unfamiliarity a chance and build a résumé of awesome memories.
12. Remaining bitter. If you’re still angry with the ex from over five years ago, or badmouthing the company that didn’t hire you — do yourself and those around you a favor by stopping. The anger is unhealthy to hold on to, plus it makes you a misery to be around. Bitter passes are typically handed out to the freshly dumped, or recently rejected — but in time you must forgive or forget. Whichever you choose; be firm on it.
13. Making yourself difficult to love. By being shutdown and over-complicated, you create a seemingly impenetrable shirt, doused in cupid repellant. We all struggle in our own unique, disastrous ways — the key is to fix them. Making yourself available, approachable and open/honest will work wonders for your love life.
14. Being a pessimistic, opinionated hater. Yeah, that’s something we all want to be around in our spare time. Every movie out isn’t terrible, every song isn’t garbage. This personality type is in for a reality check when eventually nobody wants anything to do with ‘em.
15. Spending large chunks of time dreaming about a utopic, perfect world in which everything is just peachy. Having high hopes and aspirations for the future is a great thing, it’s just important to draw the line of frequency somewhere. Picturing a fantasy land in which you own nice things, are surrounded by beautiful people and have Uncle Scrooge sized piles of money isn’t going to bring those things to fruition. The dreaming is the easy part, it’s the living that requires some heavy lifting and effort.
I don’t know about you guys but I am guilty of about 3 of these things. I’m definitely working on improving though, so wish me luck! Hope you gained some kind of insight or inspiration from reading this. Join me next week for another edition of The Real Deal. Until then, don’t ruin your 20’s!!! Lady Love out! <3
Take a look at your face
Tell me what you see
What’s opposite you in the mirror
Is more than skin deep
There’s a powerful women
Who endures strain and strife
Who deserves nothing less
Than the best things in life
To be a wife
A loved one who’s esteemed most high
Who always walks with her head up to the sky
Don’t let these cowardice males
Take anything away from you
There are real men out there with love in their hearts
And there’s always a space for you
Look at your face
There should always be a smile there
Regardless of your shape, color,
Size or texture of hair
But sometimes ladies
You forget to compliment yourselves
So the reassurance you don’t get from you
You seek from someone else
The pain from your past
And insecurity of your now
Gets invested in a man
That claims he loves you
But really doesn’t know how
So you fall in love with him
Hoping he’ll be exactly what you need
But please beautiful,
Take another look before you proceed
Look at your face
That smile isn’t authentic
I know it sounded good when he uttered those words
But do you think he really meant it?
Yet you give him a chance
You make him your man
You tell him to show you he loves you
And he does it
With his hands
Now look at your face
That bruise on your cheek shouldn’t be there
Now you want to leave this man
But you’re far too scared
So you let him call you a bitch
And pull you by your hair
Laying in a pool of your own blood
Crying to God that it’s unfair
You’re sore, in tears
And as you just lay there
That man is in the other room
And he doesn’t even care.
Look at your face
Please tell me that you’ve had enough
Please tell me that you’re ready
To get away from this man
To go pack up your stuff
Look at your face, that isn’t love
Those marks on your neck isn’t something that love does
You shouldn’t have to go to work
With a new pair of shades
There should be no blood from your lip
Look at your face
I know that’s not something you want to see
I know in your heart that you want to be free
I know it’s hard to let go
You’ve invested a lot
But when is enough, enough?
This shit’s got to stop
You have to leave now
Put your safety first
I don’t want to see you in a Hearst
Look at your face
That strength is still there
Look deeper until you find it
You don’t have to be scared
There’s a woman in that mirror
Who knows she’s too good for this
Keep searching until you find her
Look at your face…
Hopefully what you see
Will remind her
You’re still beautiful sister
At your face
Dashun Cathcart - @JusticethePoet on twitter
So….I’m very much aware that it is not Friday and that I have not posted in 3 weeks if I’m not mistaken. Things have not been that hectic in my life. I just didn’t want to bore anyone with forced sarcasm and wit. I wanted to speak truthfully when I did decide to post again. I am currently dealing with an issue but due to professionalism and company policy (since I’m typing this at work) I won’t go into too much detail. I was going to title this post Working hard at Hardly Working but I figured a title that long wasn’t worth what I have to say. With one week left in summer vacation I just wanted to express my feelings on this past summer and the people that I have been blessed to share it with. Just bare with me. This is not a Welcome Back newsletter post.
To light skin. Thank you for showing me a side to life I did not know existed and helping me understand (or remember) what is looks and feels like to be adored. I will never forget the many days and nights I spent with you just watching your eyes spread wide or dilate from excitement and the mere mention of us spending time together. I admire you for being able to make it through the storms you faced and slowly mature and grow into the young woman you are becoming. I enjoyed the time we shared together and I look forward to our future. One thing. All that whining and complaining shit……has got to stop! Prince said it best. Act your age, not your shoe size. Please understand that asking people to treat you like an adult does not come with much appreciation or acceptance of YOUR responsibilities. It’s not my job to remember what your schedule is. You have to learn to stop taking things so seriously and appreciate the little things for that is where peace and tranquility solely lie in this cruel and unjust world. I pray and hope that your continued growth includes fixing known issues. There is no point in acknowledging that there is an issue…..and doing nothing to fix said issue. That’s just exhausting. At the end of the day, I’m glad that you have become a mainstay in my life and look forward to whatever life has in store for us.
To you Mohawk. I’m very proud of the man you are slowly becoming. Yes, I said slowly. You’re moving like a snail in a race with gazelles. I’m not even sure if you’ve noticed that I have given up trying to instill a sense of urgency into our life because I’m too busy trying to place in my own race. Unfortunately, we may not be old but we damn sure are not young. Technology is allowing more people to fight for the jobs and positions that you are after so you don’t have time to not go for what you want NOW. We have been blessed to live in an age where every single day someone can become a millionaire. I remember when we were younger, we used to talk about buying cars and going to Atlantic City and Vegas. We’ve accomplished those things and it’s about time that our sights move on to bigger and better things. But I can’t hold you hand through this. They say, you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink. You’re a very smart and capable person. You just to get out of your own way and see what it is that you are supposed to do with your life….and then DO IT! You deserve so much more than what you are currently receiving from life…. champagne rooms included lol.
Mommy. I miss you so much. Getting this tattoo was the best thing I think I’ve ever done because it allows me to think of you everyday for positive reasons (there weren’t too many negative reasons). I know that I didn’t hold up my end of the bargain by leaving college all those years ago. But as we approach the beginning of Fall semester….with the knowledge that I will be walking in May next year….I just wish you were here (physically) to share in this with me. While other people blog and post and step out into the limelight to stroke their own egos, I did it because I innately knew that with my birth with most of your opportunity to do the same for yourself. I did poetry because I knew you enjoyed it. I stuck with radio because I knew you you admired it. I love the music you grew up listening to. Everything I do, I do to show the world that your sacrifice was not in vain. I feel so alone in this life sometimes. Like no one but these words you and grandma ever truly understand this enigma wrapped in a riddle that is T. Mitch. And now that i know that I will be receiving what was most important to you I feel like I have finally gotten back to where I am supposed to be in life. And before my co-workers begin to ask me why I’m crying….I’ll end this by saying I love you now, loved you then and always will.
Enjoy the rest of your week people!